How do we change our preoccupation with negative thinking?  The answer to that is simple; 

Firstly it is essential to take your attention away from the negative thinking.

A simple way to cut the patterns of your mind running wild is this one; Get a rubber band, one that is a little larger than your wrist, put the rubber band on your wrist like a bracelet.  Each time you find yourself being self absorbed in negative thinking the simply ping the rubber band. This process reframes the pattern, it allows you to consciously say, “I choose not to think in that way,” “This is the outcome I want for me in my life ~ and think about aspects of your life that empower you. Rather than thinking about the negative aspects which simply churn over and over and get no where. 

Take control of the reins, not by negating the negative ~ but by choosing to think other things.  After you have pinged the rubber band a few hundred times, you sure become aware of what you have been thinking, and how easy it is to simply ~"Change your mind."

When you’re emotionally struggling, its easy to just feel overwhelmed and want the world to go away and leave you alone.  Although it is good to wrap yourself in cotton wool, (so to speak) for an hour or two, it is not good to stay there indefinitely.  A Key to getting past emotional trauma is to keep physically active.  The old adage, “Idle hands are the devils workshop.” Basically says it all. 

If you are just sitting doing nothing, you are more likely to keep dwelling on what went wrong.  And when you think about what went wrong, what you’re going to attract is “more of the same.”  Do you want to keep creating more sad energy? 

Of course not, so find something anything healthy, to take your mind to a constructive place of thinking.

• Go for a walk
• Clean the house
• Mow the lawn
• Wash the car
• Read a good book
• Go to a movie 
• Do anything that will allow you to move the energy 
• Focus on other activities that require your attention 
• It is far healthier to go jogging to get rid of you
• Dont ~ sit and wallow in self pity 

Restrain ~ from telling your story to other people 

TRANSMUTE THE ENERGY ~ use it for something positive ~ I used to scrub the house, I had the cleanest house in the country.  Dig the garden, wash the car, but keep your mind busy with things you can focus on.

There are 3 stages to getting over a bad relationship

~ Anger ~ Acceptance ~ Restoring Purpose to your life.